A Series Of Firsts Part I

Jasmine & Kayla                   

“I’m trying!”
“Try throwing with your wrist.”
“Shit.”
“That’s alright. We can go on the jungle gym if you want.”
“I can try again?”
“It’s okay. We’re gonna play baseball in P.E. anyway.”
“If we go to the jungle gym, can you be on the outside part? I’m not wearing shorts. Mama said I have to watch it today when I left the apartment with Juanita and Jacinda.”
“You always wear dresses huh?”
“Yeah, my grandmother, she makes them and sends them here. I get em first, then Juanita, then Jacinda. She loves making dresses. Sometimes people make fun of me, of us, but I don’t care. At least nobody has the same clothes as me. Well, except for my sisters. But you, you never wear dresses. I’ve never seen you wear a dress before.”
“Nah, I don’t really like em. I mean… I like your dresses. I like em on, I like em on other girls but I just like wearing jeans, and my dad likes that too. He likes that I want to have short hair and that I’m not asking him if I can wear makeup.”
“I like your hair. I could never have short hair.”
“Why not?”
“Cos, I wouldn’t look good with it. Next month for my birthday I’m gonna get really long extensions. I want em down to my waist. My mama just rolled her eyes when I asked, but I know she’s gonna do it cos I’m on the honor roll. I like school, but I hate Mrs. de Vries. You’re so lucky you have Mr. Schnieders.”
“He’s okay but he’s so boring!”
“Ha ha ha ha ha.”
“He is. I got in trouble for putting my head down when we had science one day.”
“We better hurry if you wanna get to the gym. Look! I think Eva, Alessandra, and Genevieve are gonna try to take it before we get there. They act like everything is there’s. C’mon!”
“Okay. Okay, I’m coming!”
“C’mon! C’mon, c’mon, c’mon. They see us! Hurry! We’re gonna make it, we’re gonna make it before them!”
“You’re too fast!”
“Ha ha ha, they’re so slow! We’re… we’re, we’re here.”
“We’re here. We made it. Alessandra just gave us the finger.”
“She hates me, but it doesn’t matter cos the jungle gym is ours! I mean they could be on here too, but whatever!”
“They don’t like you huh?”
“More like I don’t like them.”
“What happened?”
“A lot of things actually, but my mama told me to stop hanging out with them. We all used to be friends, and they used to come over to my house sometimes.”
“You and Eva, and Alessandra, and Genevieve, you were best friends?”
“We always had the same teachers til last year. Genevieve and I had ballet together.”
“You were in ballet?”
“Yeah. Her mother used to take us and my mama would pick us up. Yeah but I quit cos the teacher said I didn’t have the right figure for it.”
”What? She said you’re like what, too big?”
“That I have too much muscle. I didn’t even tell my mama. I just told her I didn’t like it anymore. She woulda… she would said something to the teacher and made it even worse. I was kind of good at it, but they said it’s for really thin girls and not for girls like me.”
“Did you ever… have a dance recital?”
“Yeah, we always did but I was in the back every time.”
“I wish I could see you… doing ballet. Do you still know how to do it?”
“Yeah… I could show you. You wanna see now?”
“Yeah! Show me!”
“Okay. So this is, wait… this Plie.”
“Clap, clap, clap, clap, clap.”
“Okay, and wait… Okay, now this is Jete. Jete, see?”
“Damn! Clap, clap, clap.”
“And… gimme a sec… okay this is Arabesque!”
“Clap! Clap! Clap! Clap! Clap! Clap! Clap! Wow. That’s so cool Jasmine.”
“I know huh?”
“Can you teach me one day how to do that?”
“Really? You wanna learn ballet?”
“Yeah, why not? It’s cool! Besides my daddy said that some hockey players do ballet.”
“Hockey players and ballet?”
“Yeah, cos, cos I think it helps them out on the ice to have good, good moves.”
“Wow, I didn’t know that. Yeah I can teach you. I can teach you what I learned at the studio.”
“That would be cool!”
“I can’t pitch, but I can Plie!”
“You’re not so bad.”
“Thanks Kayla! That’s real nice, but I’m terrible.”
“No you’re not.”
“Yes I am, but it’s okay.” Are you going to your mama’s this weekend?”
“No. No, I… we’re staying at my dad’s. We’re supposed to see her next week but maybe not. Sometimes she tells us that she’s gonna come and then she doesn’t. Her new boyfriend, he doesn’t like kids.”
“Oh! Sorry!”
“Maybe, maybe when we’re older then we can go see her more. I think Paul doesn’t like us cos, she has to do everything for us, well not for me, but for David, and Thierry, and she can’t, she doesn’t have enough time for him.”
“I’m gonna ask my mama if you can come to our apartment. I told her about you!”
“You did?”
“Yeah, she was asking me about the new comic that I was drawing and who was the girl, and I told her that we were friends, that you’re new here, and that I finally have someone again who, who’s my friend. And obviously I was talking about you Kayla!”
“Well, I told my dad about you too.”
“Ha ha ha. You did, really? What did you tell him?”
“He, he… he also saw your drawings, but he asked me who did em, cos he knows I can’t draw.”
“Everyone can draw.”
“Not as good as you.”
“Tsch. You just have to practice.”
“Can you teach me that too?”
“Yeah, but you have to not give up okay?”
“I have the drawings you gave me in my room, by my desk.”
“I can make you another one, but after lunch. What do you want me to draw?”
“Hmm. Is it okay if it’s not for me?”
“Yeah sure, but who’s it for then?”
“Can you draw something for my mom? Something I can give to her, if she comes next week?”
“Yeah, I can do that. What do you want me to draw?”
“My daddy told me that she really likes lilies. Lilies are her favorite flowers. Can you draw some lilies? Please?”
“You know what? Ask your dad if you can come to my house, and we can have a sleepover. My mama will make everything, cos it’s your first time coming over. After that it’ll just be pizza. Do you know pineapple punch?”
“No, what’s that. Is it a pineapple ice cream shake?”
“No! It’s better than that. I’ll ask her to make that, and chicken stew and rice and peas, and honey carrots.”
“That sounds so good! My dad just makes us brown rice, chicken, and broccoli and carrots everyday.”
“I’ll ask my mama if I bring some food for you and your brothers sometimes.”
”Oh no, don’t do that.”
”No, I’m gonna ask her. So you ask your dad about this weekend. Okay?”
“That’s the bell.”
“Okay. Well, I’ll see you at lunch. We’ll plan it then. Let’s sit on the bench by the slide today. If you come over on Friday we can watch movies as long as we want or until midnight. Then maybe my mama will make us pancakes and after chores…”
“We have to do chores too?”
“I always have to do chores on Saturday. Even when I have friends over. You’re gonna help me aren’t you?”
“Yes. Yes, I, I’m gonna help you.”
“Well after the chores, I have an idea.”
“What?”
“Instead of me drawing lilies, I’m gonna teach you how to draw them so then you can give your mom lilies whenever you want to.”



Temi & Bongani



“Okay go! Hurry up. You need me to push?”
“No, I got it.”
“Are you out the way?”
“Yeah. Yeah, come in. Toss me the bags first.”
“Alright. Okay, here!”
“Yeah there’s no one here. Okay come up. Come up now.”
“Alright. Shit. Help! Pull.”
“I got you, I got you. You’re in.”
“Phew.”
“Fuck. We did it. Sigh.”
“There’s his jacket.”
“Okay, I got it. Look! the photo of us at The Bronze.”
“No leave that. Remember we gotta leave stuff like that, otherwise it’s too risky, they’ll know we did it.”
“Okay you’re right.”
“It’s weird being in here. Without him. Knowing that he’s never…”
“That’s why we’re here. We need to get everything. They’re just gonna throw all his stuff away anyway.”
”Let’s do it. Let’s do this. Gimme the hard drive. Okay… it’s got.. we need to try something cos you need a password.”
“Lemme see. I thought this could happen. You look for his… look through the records, but just take, take the good ones and only take a few. We don’t want it to look like… or we want to try to just take a few things, or just take what we can without it maybe looking like we were… or anybody was here. Take the records that are the rare ones and then the ones that he always played for us. I’m in.”
“Did you know his password?”
“No, but… it’s Porfirio. It’s easy to guess.”
“Was it Dovescry1984?”
“The same password for everything.”
“Should we do it? I mean the computer? That shit’s private.”
“I think it’s better us than them. At least we’re his best friends and… at least it doesn’t get erased or something. The important shit.”
“I still can’t believe what Claudia said. About the funeral.”
“I can. ‘I know my people’, as my mom would say. They’re gonna pretend like nothing happened, especially if no one back home or know one from the community knows.”
“That’s really fucked up.”
“That’s the way it is.”
“Claudia wanted the student council to plant a tree for him but… his parents said no. They didn’t even want his name mentioned, Claudia said, at the assembly.”
“Of course they didn’t.”
“What are you taking?”
“All his pics, folders, music, downloads, like everything. What are you looking for?”
“His journals.”
“If the laptop is still here, then everything else is still here. We’re gonna find it.”
“At least Claudia got to go… to say goodbye.”
“Did you really wanna go and pretend like they did, like she had to do? Nah, me, I’m good. The last time I saw him was the last goodbye. Shit, I already know tomorrow’s not promised. I… I just didn’t know that he was gonna like that.”
“Phew. What about Mister… what did he call him?”
“The teddy bear? Should we take that? I feel like that’s kind of obvious… and his name is um, It’s like Mister Ferdinand or something.”
“We’re gonna steal this bear and we don’t even know it’s name.”
“I don’t know B. I don’t think we should take it. Find his shit though, his journals, his, his, his poetry. Just, we can’t let them have it.”
“I’m down to do this. You know that, but what if we’re… what if this is wrong? What if they want his stuff. What if they do notice… that things are missing?”
“Nah. They don’t get that right… they don’t get to decide that now. It’s their fault he’s not here anymore and we have to… we have to do this. Honestly we should take everything, but we’re just gonna take what we can pack up and carry. Things they probably won’t notice are missing. But nah, they don’t get to, to go back. To care now. To hold all of this stuff just for themselves or to decide what to throw away. They fuckin took Frio away from all of us, but they’re not the keepers of his shit. We are. It’s like the bible says… okay you’re not Christian, but we’re our brother’s keeper. His shit is our shit now. For good.”
“It’s not under the bed, the journal, or in his whatever you call this. I’m gonna check the closet.”"
“The fuckin closet!”
“...yeah... what if I can’t find them in here.”
“They gotta be there.”
“Maybe he got rid of them… before…”
“We have to try, we just have to look.”
“Sniff. Sniff. Sniff. I can smell him.”
“Sniff, sniff. Yeah me too. I smell coconut oil, it’s in the pillow case.”
“Are you sure it’s not…”
“Tsh. I don’t wanna think about that, but if Porfirio was here, he would be laughing so hard right now. And he’d probably hit you upside the head. Why would that shit be on his pillowcase?”
“Ha ha ha ha. Yeah you’re right.”
“Sniff. Mmmmm. It’s definitely coconut oil, you fuckin pervert!”
”Sorry Frio. It’s a joke man.”
”Sorry Frio. We’re tryin man. We’re tryin.”
“Should I take anything else from the closet, there’s some clothes, there’s actually nothing but clothes in here, but there’s some books, uh, what else… like boxes of things, like papers and…”
“But… but not a journal or anything like that? What are the books?”
“Some graphic novels. Kid’s books, like picture books, and then, some other books, encyclopedias. There’s The Watchmen. Persepolis, is that how you say it? Superman Red Son. X-men Phalanx Covenant. Mm… Let The Circle Be Unbroken. And The People Could Fly. They Came Before Columbus. The Hobbit. Life Doesn’t Frighten… Me at All. Native Son. I don’t know there’s a lot?”
“Um… take… take um, “Native Son”, “The Watchmen”, and “And The People Could Fly”. And… take the encyclopedias.”
“We can’t take all the encyclopedias. Which one you want me to take?”
“Take the one… is there one for the letter “p”?”
“”P” for Porfirio?”
“Yes genius!”
“Damn, okay? I was just asking.”
“This is taking a long time, copying everything.”
“They’re not gonna be back. They’re at work. We just gotta make it back before fifth period.”
“We will. We will even if I have to take the laptop.”
“You can’t take the laptop! This whole time you’re like ‘We have to choose stuff they won’t notice is missing’. If we take the laptop, then we should just take everything.”
“I know. I know… but… we can’t find his journals, all his stuff on here, that’s, that’s him. The shit we have on our computers, that’s phew, that’s like who really are. Everybody’s keeping a journal even if they don’t know it. Ima delete his history too though. Let me do that right now.”
“Fuck…”
“We might as well go all the way. We take some of the things that he cared about, and we… we, we make sure that… that there’s nothing left for them to find out, to hide. But we do if Frio, that’s what makes it okay. We’re doin it for him.”
“What if they have the journals somewhere in the house? Should I look?”
“Mm. I don’t think so, like why would they be somewhere else, but anyway it’s too risky. How much time do we have?”
“Shit. That’s not the question right now.”
“Oh fuck. Well it doesn’t matter. We can be ten minutes late.”
“I’ve only been late twice this semester.”
“This is gonna be my fifth tardy, but fuck detention.”
“Damn, but if you get detention… “
”I don’t care. Anyway, my parents are being really like, ‘Are you okay son’? My mom hugged me the other day after I told her, and she just, she cried on my shoulder and she told me, ‘I just want you to be happy my son. I want you to be here and to be happy’. Ha… then my dad came in and just hugged us both. I could get expelled right now and they wouldn’t care. Nothing would happen.”
“If you say so. Being here right now, trying to, to save his, his stuff…last night I was thinking, thinking in my sleep, how come we got the parents that we did and he got his parents?”
“Since when does your dad know?”
“He doesn’t. I’m not gonna tell him until I go away, somewhere far away… to college. But when I tell him, he’s gotta be okay with it, cos it’s just me and him and our family on the other side of the world who disowned him cos he married my mom.”
“B…”
“I’ve looked everywhere. I don’t… I don’t know where they are. I know you wanted, I know you wanted us to get em, but I don’t think they’re here.”
“Damn! At least we tried. He knows. He does. I know he knows.”
“Are you sure we can’t take the picture?”
“B, we can’t do it.”
“Are you almost done?”
“Our friend has a lot of shit. Look at his desktop.”
“Messy desktop, but fuckin scary how clean his room is.”
“Always. It was always like this. They made him keep it this way.”
“I wanna do something for him.”
“Like what?”
“Like, when the stone’s up, let’s leave some flowers there but… phew… but I also wanna, I don’t know, have something for him, like what you do when someone, someone’s gone.”
“We can do that B. We can plan it, and we can do it. We’re gonna do it with Claudia. I think we could do it at the youth center.”
“Yeah. Yeah, somewhere like that would be the perfect place.”
“We were there so many times last year and, I think they would help us, like plan it and stuff. We just have to see if they will keep it, so his parents don’t find out. Speaking of parents finding out, you know you gotta keep all this. Porforio’s things, cos…”
“Yeah, my parents they know that they’re not gonna find drugs but since the summer and them seeing me in the parade, they’re scared of finding gay shit. Who knew that would cure them of their snooping ways? Okay. I think I’ve got everything now. History’s deleted.”
“Alright. Let’s get the fuck outta here.”
“Wait. I just wanna, I just wanna lay down, on the bed for a minute.”
“Okay...”
“Come here B. Come on. I think, I think this where he…”
”Where he did it.”
”Maybe. Maybe this was the last place…”
“Alright but this is kinda weird.”
”No it’s not. Why is it weird. Everyone dies, he just… he shouldn’t have gone like that.”
“Should we say something?”
“I’m good, but you can.”
”I don’t know what to say.”
”Then just be quiet and, and just think about Porfirio. Maybe tell him something you always wanted to say.”
”Like what?”
”I don’t know. That’s for you.”
”…”
”…”
“Okay. You ready”
“Should we take Mister Fernando?”
“Mister Ferdinand… and no. We have to leave him here okay? I swear you want us to get caught.”
“Sorry! Damn!”
“Okay. I don’t think you can tell that someone was here. Let’s go.”
“Okay.”
“Wait. Here.”
“Are you sure?”
“Take it. But you have to keep it.”
“Alright.”
“They’re not gonna say anything. If we took the laptop and, and that… then yeah, but maybe they’ll think he took it.”
”Then let’s go, let’s get outta here. We did it.”
”Bye Porfirio.”
”Later Frio.”
“Wait a sec.”
“Okay… what?”
“I just wanna… muah.”
“Mmmm.”
“Muah.”
“Muah.”
“Okay let’s go.”
“You just kissed me.”
“I know. You kissed me too.”
“What does that mean?”
“Let’s talk about it in the car after we come up with a good excuse for being twenty minutes late to fifth period.”

Written by Isaiah Lopaz, Anthology / Appendix 2021